Contemplative Claire

I was skyping with my sister Nicola on Saturday night and was expressing to her my frustration over the disappearance of "energetic Claire". A combination of being a little sick, some unique work pressures, new responsibilities at church, anxiety about the future,  and some personal challenges have left me feeling a little low on energy and zest for life. I am used to a fast-paced and full life, and although my plate is still full, I find myself needing (and sometimes wanting too) a lot more down time made up of quiet evenings and weekends. And I find this frustrating.

Nicola in her wisdom, reminded me that "contemplative Claire" is OK too - it is OK to have "quieter" seasons that have a different rhythm and that offer the chance for new insights, and unique ways to grow and learn. She is very right. Being frustrated and annoyed in this season will only mean I miss out on what I could learn. I need to listen to what my heart, mind and body are telling me.

On Sunday we heard a message at church that rang true for me. Our pastor was talking about how there is often a gap between where we are and where we want to be in life (this could apply to multiple areas of life, dreams and goals). It is really easy for this gap to become filled with doubt, frustration, fear and anxiety. Instead, he encouraged us to let this gap be filled with things of God - His peace, His strength and His joy. It was a pertinent reminder to me to shift my thinking. This week, my devotional (Jesus Calling, S. Young) also contained words of encouragement along these lines...

"Remember that I can fit everything into a pattern for good, including the things you wish were different. Start with where you are at this point in time and space, accepting that this is where I intend you to be. You will get through today one step, one moment at a time. Your main responsibility is to remain attentive to Me, letting me guide you through the many choices along your pathway".